Monday, January 20, 2014

Getting Over My Pride

Part Two

When I first met my husband, there were so many ups and downs laced between the love we were discovering.  Despite our differences, a few things were true for us-always.  We valued our faith in God, and His unwavering love.  We knew that few things in life are more important than family.  In fact, jobs would never define who we were as a person but were a way to make life go 'round. 

We desired children, and believed they were a blessing to enjoy the abundance of love that we had for one another.  Therefore, when we began our marriage, we also began starting our family.  We prepared our hearts for children and were crushed when disappointment came-month after month.  I grieved the loss of our future children and began to go into a sort of identity crisis.  If staying-at-home as a mom was what we had planned, where did this leave me?

Life was in full force, and finances were a burden.  With surgeries on the books and medical debt adding up, one income was not an option.  I did the practical thing and got a paycheck.

My first job out of college was just that-a job.  It was an eight-to-five lifestyle that left me frustrated and empty.  I had worked so hard for my education and had nothing to apply it to.  Yes, I had dabbled with the idea of going onto get my master's degree, work full time in the field, and make a name for myself as a counselor.  However, my heart was still with my dreams.

I began searching for the greatest job and landed at a place that would have made any graduate in my field jealous.  It was a program that had everything I had learned.  I made a difference in people's lives and valued the work I was doing.  But, something was missing.  My faith could not be a part of my career in that work.

Therefore, I followed God's call and stepped into the ministry as you've heard all about.  The journey was short and not taken lightly.  It was through each step that I made it to here.  Then, something happened that I never could have imagined.

That same respect and value I had for my mother and grandmother all of these years was absent in those around me.  There is something profound that happens when you go from being a "professional" to denying the ways of the world and working in the most important field-your home.  That's when, I had to get over my pride and realize that the world's perception of my newfound joy was not the same as my own.

The Lord is shaping my heart, daily.  And, this experience will be an incredibly humbling one at that. So, pray in agreement with me that God will use this opportunity for what is good and righteous, and the attacks of those around me may never pierce my heart.

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