I watched the elderly gossip and live in a "my way or the highway" mentality. The parents desperately searched for answers to raise their kids to "ask Jesus into their heart" and then they were off the hook for the remainder of their parenting. Young adults developed a "it could always be worse" attitude when reflecting on their own lives, and teens would question how much sin they could get away with before it is "too much". The preteens would continue to do whatever they could to "fit in" whether that meant getting an invite to the party on Saturday or knowing the church answers on Sunday. Kids were kids and parents made excuses as they were either afraid to "spare the rod" or afraid to not "let them be little".
As a brand new parent, one that hasn't even laid hands on my babe yet, I am sure I will one day "eat my words" as my family has told me. However, I set out to be intentional about some very important things when it comes to bringing up my son in a confusing world.
It has been heavy on my heart as I have watched those around me open up about the reality of their lives as adults. Just within the past few months, I have received criticism for having such "high standards" from the very Christians I grew up with.
Would you ever tell your little girl to lower her standards to be treated with love, respect, dignity, and value? Would you ever tell her that she needs to settle because it is unrealistic to expect someone to care about her needs above their own?
I have watched people I admired from a distance become increasingly imperfect as the masks have come off. The families that I thought had everything, have brokenness & separation. They have put down their own family members for the outcomes they have caused from choosing to accept the things of the world. They have pushed people away out of fear of confrontation. They have tried everything to look perfect on the outside, but in the quiet of their homes are living a lie. They have tried to keep up the appearance, becoming more materialistic with each passing day. They have lowered their standards to fit in, and even made excuses to make themselves look better. They have criticized those that uphold higher standards for being "judgmental" or "non-accepting" because they choose not to participate in their acts.
I am in no way claiming to be perfect. In fact, I am an imperfect human. The difference is, I recognize my need for God and strive to be better because of it. The hardest part about thinking about raising a child is trying to hold them to be more Christ-like rather than being a Christian. It is daunting to think that even the people they may look up to, may not provide them with the right direction. It is my hope that I can look to the only role-model worthy of having my son's eyes upon Him. And, I pray that when he walks in the footprints of his mommy and daddy, he is ultimately following Christ.
In a world that teaches selfishness, I aim to teach selflessness.
In a world that teaches success, I aim to teach satisfaction.
In a world that teaches rules, I aim to teach obedience.
In a world that teaches confidence, I aim to teach humility.
In a world that teaches drunkenness, I aim to teach desired sobriety.
In a world that teaches lower standards, I aim to teach increased standards.
In a world that teaches sexuality, I aim to teach love.
In a world that teaches self-gratification, I aim to teach long-term peace.
In a world that teaches greed, I aim to teach financial blessings.
In a world that teaches laws, I aim to teach respect.
In a world that teaches criticism, I aim to teach acceptance.
I believe the Cleavers said it best when June said, "Ward, you're no better than your son."
-"That's right, but what's wrong with letting my son be better than I was?"
