In my world
In my mind
I picture things different
All the time
My mornings begin with giggles and squeals
From tiny little voices
In which God is revealed
I don't rush to get ready
To drive away from home
Or sit in front of a screen
Or answer a phone
Instead I answer the continual "Why"
From curious learners
Hungry to know what's under God's sky
I make breakfast and get ready
To see what is in store
As each day is a new beginning
For us to explore
A kiss goodbye to the one I love
As he steps out the door
To do something worth working for
My lessons learned
Become things to teach
So that my family may know
Everything is within reach
I am needed, it's true
To rock and soothe and feed
A baby that depends strictly
On me to meet their needs
But it isn't just a title
The desire to be "mom"
There is something much more
To my dreams that I long
The greatest blessing so far in my life
Was when God graced me with the love
And a man took me as his wife
It wasn't just a ring, a diamond or a day
That defined my marriage
But it became me
In every way
Every decision from that moment on
Didn't belong to just me
It was for us, for a purpose
For God's greater need
To glorify Him was the desire of my heart
So that others may know
They are never apart
Joined as one
We became bigger than us
When we said I do
And committed to trust
So the life that I want isn't just about me
It is a life that I long for
So others may see
A family that is loving
Centered around Him
So that when they see our lives
They can't help but question
"Why are they so happy?"
"What's different about them?"
"I want what they have"
They will be changed from within
The pitter patter of little feet
Is only a moment
In God's grand scheme
Days fly by
People grow old
But the life that we live
Is His story to be told
May our lives be a witness
A way we can show
That the only thing that remains always
Is the salvation given from Him alone
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Spell Check
I often find it entertaining to go back and read what I actually put down in writing in the spur of the moment. Let it be known right now that I do not proofread as I should. When I finally have the time to put my thoughts to the page, it is mostly during the middle of a busy work day when I have approximately an hour to prepare some form of leftovers from the fridge, answer the phone (or I'll be returning the calls later), catch up on data entry and paperwork from my clients, sit down and try to relax a few moments, check emails, and type something while chewing my halfway warmed food. Therefore, I am openly admitting (and apologizing) for the lack of proper grammar and/or misspelled words that you are reading over at any given moment. I promise I will (at least try) to spell check the next time I hit publish for your reading sanity.
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
Straight A's?
When thinking about my report card, I can relive the disappointment that occurred when my perfect academic score dropped from an A to B (and so on). Although there are always exceptions out there, I am reminded of the fact that I am innately human; therefore, I will have failures in my life.
One thing that stuck with me recently was hearing the scenario given of a family receiving their child's report card. When looking at the letters, the read aloud the several As and their minds focused in on the "F" that followed (math, maybe?). As a parent would do, they immediately started lecturing and brainstorming how they could improve this grade.
So many times in life, we focus in on the things that reflect our failures and try to correct them-over and over again. We relive the tests we faced. "If only I did...I could have passed." We focus on trying to get bigger and better in the area of "improvement"-sometimes forgetting the things that were once our strongest points. We spend so much time thinking about our math skills that we fall behind in developing what we were good at. I believe (even more so now than ever before) that our failures do not define our lives. In other words, "manage the F, but celebrate the A." Rather than focusing so much on what we could fix, why not make what we are good at even better?
"Look straight ahead and fix your eyes on what lies before you."
One thing that stuck with me recently was hearing the scenario given of a family receiving their child's report card. When looking at the letters, the read aloud the several As and their minds focused in on the "F" that followed (math, maybe?). As a parent would do, they immediately started lecturing and brainstorming how they could improve this grade.
So many times in life, we focus in on the things that reflect our failures and try to correct them-over and over again. We relive the tests we faced. "If only I did...I could have passed." We focus on trying to get bigger and better in the area of "improvement"-sometimes forgetting the things that were once our strongest points. We spend so much time thinking about our math skills that we fall behind in developing what we were good at. I believe (even more so now than ever before) that our failures do not define our lives. In other words, "manage the F, but celebrate the A." Rather than focusing so much on what we could fix, why not make what we are good at even better?
"Look straight ahead and fix your eyes on what lies before you."
Strength
I recently heard someone say that our greatest opportunities for growth are in our strengths, not in our weaknesses. What a profound statement to reflect on the things that God has gifted us with. If every person was meant to be developed perfectly in every aspect...doctor, carpenter, computer technician, police man, counselor...then we could all take care of ourselves. There is deep need within each and every one of us to need others. This relational way of thinking reminds us to lean not on our own understanding, but to depend on something besides ourselves.
I have realized that when I think I can do things on my own, I tend to negate the strengths of those around me.
"Sugar, will you get this down for me?"
I have often found that I may need my husband's help to complete what others may view as a simple task. His height, although he may not see it as anything to think twice about, is a strength he can use to bless those around him (ie. me). Something so minute reminds me to be grateful that I have someone by my side and reiterates that we all have something to bring to the table.
We are each created to be different than those around us. And, the strengths that we posess that others do not, are the very things that someone may have a desperate need for. Someone may look down on me for my emotional way of thinking, but I am there to cry with someone when they grieve the loss of their loved one and just need a shoulder to cry on. We are wired to continually search for others. We are not meant to be alone. In fact, we are never alone.
I am reminded of the footprints in the sand that so boldly illustrate how our Heavenly Father carries us through our trials and tribulations. If once the storm rolled in, we began wandering aimlessly through life to say to those around us, "I got this. I don't need you," then we miss out on one of the greatest blessings of all in life. There is a reason why so many people find God in their hour of weakness. It is in that moment that they need something/someone else.
As beautiful as the statement was made, I feel the tug in my heart to change it to something bigger than what they initially stated.
Our greatest opportunity to grow others is in our strength. As a Christian, my biggest strength is the very relationship that I have to offer each and every one around me. He fulfills my thirst from a well that will never run dry. He carries me through the things I think are impossible. He gives me a peace that surpasses understanding. He places the lives around me in my life for a reason. He gives purpose to my life and I will spend every day searching for His will for my life. When others put me down, He picks me up. He has gifted me with abilities, characteristics, and passions to bless those around me and use in a way that will honor his command to reach out to them. Although the things that define me are drastically different that the things that make up them, we are equally created to be boldly capable of anything. He is the best thing that ever happened to me.
My God is my strength.
I have realized that when I think I can do things on my own, I tend to negate the strengths of those around me.
"Sugar, will you get this down for me?"
I have often found that I may need my husband's help to complete what others may view as a simple task. His height, although he may not see it as anything to think twice about, is a strength he can use to bless those around him (ie. me). Something so minute reminds me to be grateful that I have someone by my side and reiterates that we all have something to bring to the table.
We are each created to be different than those around us. And, the strengths that we posess that others do not, are the very things that someone may have a desperate need for. Someone may look down on me for my emotional way of thinking, but I am there to cry with someone when they grieve the loss of their loved one and just need a shoulder to cry on. We are wired to continually search for others. We are not meant to be alone. In fact, we are never alone.
I am reminded of the footprints in the sand that so boldly illustrate how our Heavenly Father carries us through our trials and tribulations. If once the storm rolled in, we began wandering aimlessly through life to say to those around us, "I got this. I don't need you," then we miss out on one of the greatest blessings of all in life. There is a reason why so many people find God in their hour of weakness. It is in that moment that they need something/someone else.
As beautiful as the statement was made, I feel the tug in my heart to change it to something bigger than what they initially stated.
Our greatest opportunity to grow others is in our strength. As a Christian, my biggest strength is the very relationship that I have to offer each and every one around me. He fulfills my thirst from a well that will never run dry. He carries me through the things I think are impossible. He gives me a peace that surpasses understanding. He places the lives around me in my life for a reason. He gives purpose to my life and I will spend every day searching for His will for my life. When others put me down, He picks me up. He has gifted me with abilities, characteristics, and passions to bless those around me and use in a way that will honor his command to reach out to them. Although the things that define me are drastically different that the things that make up them, we are equally created to be boldly capable of anything. He is the best thing that ever happened to me.
My God is my strength.
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Joy Comes in the Morning
I have heard that phrase so many times before, but as you can see from my previous post-there isn't much joy in my heart in my mornings. How selfish am I to think that it is okay to wake up and take for granted the day that God has chosen to let me experience? I somehow have forgotten that every day is a gift from Him, and as long as I'm still breathing He has a purpose for my life. I don't necessarily believe in "coincidence". In fact, I believe as it is written that there is a season for everything-including pain.
I would like to think that the season I am experiencing is nothing more than growing pains. When we make the decision to put Christ first in our lives, there will be opposition. The enemy will knock down every door we reach for, but it all happens for a reason. As long as our eyes remain fixed on the Lord, He will lead us to the right path.
I believe that Jesus Christ sacrificed His life so that I might live, and it must break His heart every day that I coast through without searching for His purpose for my life. What a tragic trade the world received when they got me instead of Him.
However, if He believes my life is worth living another day-I must start living it. I must embrace the opportunities that lay before me throughout the day. I must continually be enveloped in prayer in a way that my relationship is so in tune with His words that He speaks through me. May my actions reflect a loving person that pleases Him. Give me strength to bite my tongue when it will only lead others astray. Make me courageous enough to step out in faith-even if it causes fear. Use the negative consequences that may come my way as a confirmation that I can only make it with Him alone. Remind me that the pain is temporary and won't last forever. If nothing else, use this moment to prepare my heart for what is to come. Use today as a reminder that when good finally comes my way, glory goes to Him alone.
I would like to think that the season I am experiencing is nothing more than growing pains. When we make the decision to put Christ first in our lives, there will be opposition. The enemy will knock down every door we reach for, but it all happens for a reason. As long as our eyes remain fixed on the Lord, He will lead us to the right path.
I believe that Jesus Christ sacrificed His life so that I might live, and it must break His heart every day that I coast through without searching for His purpose for my life. What a tragic trade the world received when they got me instead of Him.
However, if He believes my life is worth living another day-I must start living it. I must embrace the opportunities that lay before me throughout the day. I must continually be enveloped in prayer in a way that my relationship is so in tune with His words that He speaks through me. May my actions reflect a loving person that pleases Him. Give me strength to bite my tongue when it will only lead others astray. Make me courageous enough to step out in faith-even if it causes fear. Use the negative consequences that may come my way as a confirmation that I can only make it with Him alone. Remind me that the pain is temporary and won't last forever. If nothing else, use this moment to prepare my heart for what is to come. Use today as a reminder that when good finally comes my way, glory goes to Him alone.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
A bug in my soup...
...or at least in my ravioli.
Have you ever just had one of "those days"? Well, I'm fairly certain that I am having one of those months. Despite my best efforts to stay very positive amidst this Spiritual warfare going on around me, I finally feel that I am at my wits end today. The last few weeks have been weighing heavily on my heart.
I mentioned before how often I struggle with all my job takes away from my family. Just when I started to think, "Well, I can just stay part-time," I hit the jackpot of all weeks. I taught a class one evening that seriously made me question whether or not I wanted to ever teach again, I had two domestic violence cases in my office, I met with a couple that just couldn't put aside their feelings to think about their daughter, and one of my most committed couples confessed he was caught having an affair. Then, after a very long day of work we finally wrapped things up to eat dinner together immediately before going to bed. With no time to blink, I warmed some not-so-delicious-or-nutritious canned ravioli at half past 10pm. It wasn't until the final bite that my sweet hubby offered to let me finish the bowl. Thus, I cut the last piece to split as I brought the spoon up to my mouth-only to find a rather large mosquito, wings and stinger fully intact, cooked into the pasta. There is nothing worse than a bug in your soup to make you sick.
If you think that was a lot, I added an additional three domestic violence cases to my mental list of frustrations and recently heard the heart-wrenching news that one of the dads in my caseload passed away from cancer. I feel like there is constantly something adding itself to my plate. The weekends are suddenly filled with a never-ending list of to dos and the weeks drag on (and on).
I. Am. Exhausted.
Sleep? What's that? Every night I find myself racing through the upcoming day's agenda and everything else that I am about to take on. I pray repeatedly that something will break this cycle of: snooze button, panick, snooze button, rush, work/work/work, listen, overload, cry, wipe the tears and suck it up, work/work/work, leave late, rush, kiss 'hello', eat, lay down, think, count sheep, imagine how much sleep I should be getting, stare at the ceiling, alarm sounds-snooze button. In fact, my mind has hit the point that it is seriously difficult to get up in the mornings. I feel this overwhelming response to the sunshine in the mornings that makes it hard to breathe.
Amidst all that time I spend not sleeping, I manage to think a lot about what changes need to happen. I had the rude awakening of Spiritual discernment that the more I teach others they can do things without the love of Christ-the more I am actually leading them away from Him. Wow, what a statement.
Not to mention the fact that the very things I get to spend endless hours teaching to others to improve their relationships is draining me from the energy to do the same for mine. Thus, I am sitting here going through the motions until God slams open a door in front of us.
Dear Lord,
Please open a door so large that we cannot help but run through it fullspeed ahead. Please take charge of our careers, our finances, our dreams, our future family, and our marriage. Please give us rest that comes from you alone-a peace that fades out all anxieties surrounding us. Give us financial peace so that the decisions we make will not be measured in money alone. Allow us to live lives that glorify Your kingdom and purpose. Grant us the ability to be generous to those around us while drawing boundaries to protect what Satan so easily will try to destroy. Remove any foothold that we may have allowed him to have in our lives. Give us a change-a change of routine, a change of struggling every day, and a change of heart. Lessen our loads to help carry Your name in a way that best represents the love You have for us. Create the perfect position for Joshua to fall into, soon. More than a job or a way to "make a living", but rather a way of living the life You want him to have. Use the money we have to multiply it into the things you want for us. Give him a vision for what our family can achieve and the passion to pursue it. Give us the courage to walk through this path together and set sail without the fear of the storms we have faced behind us. Take hold of our future and shape it in a way that the signs align perfectly so we cannot help but choose You. Grant me the ability to stand behind his decisions, knowing that You are mercifully directing his choices. Bless us with a family that will be resilient enough to be different than the normal things I face every day. Allow us to be different. Let me stay home with our children to watch them grow and guide them to follow you and lead others. Help me make it through the day.
Amen.
Have you ever just had one of "those days"? Well, I'm fairly certain that I am having one of those months. Despite my best efforts to stay very positive amidst this Spiritual warfare going on around me, I finally feel that I am at my wits end today. The last few weeks have been weighing heavily on my heart.
I mentioned before how often I struggle with all my job takes away from my family. Just when I started to think, "Well, I can just stay part-time," I hit the jackpot of all weeks. I taught a class one evening that seriously made me question whether or not I wanted to ever teach again, I had two domestic violence cases in my office, I met with a couple that just couldn't put aside their feelings to think about their daughter, and one of my most committed couples confessed he was caught having an affair. Then, after a very long day of work we finally wrapped things up to eat dinner together immediately before going to bed. With no time to blink, I warmed some not-so-delicious-or-nutritious canned ravioli at half past 10pm. It wasn't until the final bite that my sweet hubby offered to let me finish the bowl. Thus, I cut the last piece to split as I brought the spoon up to my mouth-only to find a rather large mosquito, wings and stinger fully intact, cooked into the pasta. There is nothing worse than a bug in your soup to make you sick.
If you think that was a lot, I added an additional three domestic violence cases to my mental list of frustrations and recently heard the heart-wrenching news that one of the dads in my caseload passed away from cancer. I feel like there is constantly something adding itself to my plate. The weekends are suddenly filled with a never-ending list of to dos and the weeks drag on (and on).
I. Am. Exhausted.
Sleep? What's that? Every night I find myself racing through the upcoming day's agenda and everything else that I am about to take on. I pray repeatedly that something will break this cycle of: snooze button, panick, snooze button, rush, work/work/work, listen, overload, cry, wipe the tears and suck it up, work/work/work, leave late, rush, kiss 'hello', eat, lay down, think, count sheep, imagine how much sleep I should be getting, stare at the ceiling, alarm sounds-snooze button. In fact, my mind has hit the point that it is seriously difficult to get up in the mornings. I feel this overwhelming response to the sunshine in the mornings that makes it hard to breathe.
Amidst all that time I spend not sleeping, I manage to think a lot about what changes need to happen. I had the rude awakening of Spiritual discernment that the more I teach others they can do things without the love of Christ-the more I am actually leading them away from Him. Wow, what a statement.
Not to mention the fact that the very things I get to spend endless hours teaching to others to improve their relationships is draining me from the energy to do the same for mine. Thus, I am sitting here going through the motions until God slams open a door in front of us.
Dear Lord,
Please open a door so large that we cannot help but run through it fullspeed ahead. Please take charge of our careers, our finances, our dreams, our future family, and our marriage. Please give us rest that comes from you alone-a peace that fades out all anxieties surrounding us. Give us financial peace so that the decisions we make will not be measured in money alone. Allow us to live lives that glorify Your kingdom and purpose. Grant us the ability to be generous to those around us while drawing boundaries to protect what Satan so easily will try to destroy. Remove any foothold that we may have allowed him to have in our lives. Give us a change-a change of routine, a change of struggling every day, and a change of heart. Lessen our loads to help carry Your name in a way that best represents the love You have for us. Create the perfect position for Joshua to fall into, soon. More than a job or a way to "make a living", but rather a way of living the life You want him to have. Use the money we have to multiply it into the things you want for us. Give him a vision for what our family can achieve and the passion to pursue it. Give us the courage to walk through this path together and set sail without the fear of the storms we have faced behind us. Take hold of our future and shape it in a way that the signs align perfectly so we cannot help but choose You. Grant me the ability to stand behind his decisions, knowing that You are mercifully directing his choices. Bless us with a family that will be resilient enough to be different than the normal things I face every day. Allow us to be different. Let me stay home with our children to watch them grow and guide them to follow you and lead others. Help me make it through the day.
Amen.
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