Wednesday, March 26, 2014

My Journey to Mrs. Oklahoma, Pity Party on Me

Signing up for Mrs. Oklahoma was definitely a stretch outside of my comfort zone.  I had ups and downs and fought internally.  I realized I couldn't compare myself to others and had to be true to myself.  I worked hard and prayed even harder. 

Moving to a part-time business role, finances were tight.  I made sure to watch what I spent and find sponsors for in-kind donations.  Business members in the community were incredibly helpful. 

My wedding photographers, the amazing Roy and Jame of Colorband PhotoArtisans, graciously took my beautiful head shots.  I was sponsored with free spray tans FOR A YEAR, and had talented individuals volunteer to do my skincare and hair.  I was truly blessed by the compassion people in the community had on me.

But, one thing I struggled with was the expectation I had of others.  I assumed that because my life was changing and I was doing something incredibly bold, others would automatically drop what was going on in their lives and support me.  In fact, I found myself face down in tears on several occasions because my friends or family hadn't even mentioned my big commitment. 

I remember thinking to myself, "so this is what it feels like to be the kid at the game with no fans in the stands."  Yes, it sounds a little childish.  I admit it.  However, when you put yourself through an emotional challenge, not being recognized can be incredibly difficult.  I fought these negative emotions even up until the week before. 

I realize now, more than ever, that I was doing this pageant for a much greater purpose. 

No comments:

Post a Comment