Signing up for Mrs. Oklahoma was definitely a stretch outside of my comfort zone. I had ups and downs and fought internally. I realized I couldn't compare myself to others and had to be true to myself. I worked hard and prayed even harder.
Moving to a part-time business role, finances were tight. I made sure to watch what I spent and find sponsors for in-kind donations. Business members in the community were incredibly helpful.
My wedding photographers, the amazing Roy and Jame of Colorband PhotoArtisans, graciously took my beautiful head shots. I was sponsored with free spray tans FOR A YEAR, and had talented individuals volunteer to do my skincare and hair. I was truly blessed by the compassion people in the community had on me.
But, one thing I struggled with was the expectation I had of others. I assumed that because my life was changing and I was doing something incredibly bold, others would automatically drop what was going on in their lives and support me. In fact, I found myself face down in tears on several occasions because my friends or family hadn't even mentioned my big commitment.
I remember thinking to myself, "so this is what it feels like to be the kid at the game with no fans in the stands." Yes, it sounds a little childish. I admit it. However, when you put yourself through an emotional challenge, not being recognized can be incredibly difficult. I fought these negative emotions even up until the week before.
I realize now, more than ever, that I was doing this pageant for a much greater purpose.
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