Friday, October 11, 2013 marked my last day in the role of Family Support Coordinator at Family Expectations. It was such a bittersweet day as I was sad to have to leave so many of the friends I had come to love. It started like any other Friday.
Come in.
Sit down.
Annette plays the "Good morning song".
Rap to Toby Mac and have a good belly laugh.
Rush to get data entry completed before our team meeting.
Go downstairs and enjoy breakfast with the group.
Take part in fellowship before heading into the training room.
Then, it quickly changed into a room full of emotions.
My director stood in front of the group as he made weekly announcements and called me up to the front. My true blue personality type took over as my stomach filled with nerves and my eyes filled with tears. He shared that is was my last day in the role and the experiences we had over the past year and a half. He mentioned that there were concerns when I took the role whether this was the right position for me to be in. We discussed the fears that come from working in this type of environment day-in and day-out--how he was afraid I would lose the sweet spirit I had come with. Then, he looked at me and stated that I never lost it. He shared his pride in the work I had put in for Family Expectations and the love I had shown. Then, he turned over the floor as I shared my heart.
I cannot express the ease in which my words came out. I shared my heart with my co-workers and how God was leading me into the ministry. I discussed my excitement in the turning of a new page and the joy that had come from working with each and every one of them. Then, I took a seat.
But, the expression of love didn't stop there. My supervisor stood in front of everyone and presented me with one of the most thoughtful gifts I could have ever imagined. She placed in my hands a journal. Scribed on the front were the words, "For I walk by faith, not by sight". She shared that my teammates had written memories and words of encouragement as I start this new journey.
I choked back the tears and let my team know of my gratitude. I listened to what would be my final FE team meeting before heading back to my desk. There, I was greeted with homemade cookies (one of my weaknesses). People gathered around as they enjoyed their kind words and hugs.
I wrapped up the morning and packed my belongings before heading out to my grandparents. It is in moments like these that we are reminded of the impact we have on others and the purpose we serve. As I sat in Gramma and Pawpaw's living room, I carefully flipped through the beautiful journal. Within it were page after page of memories to cherish. I was amazed by some of the letters that followed-letters of how I had shown the light of the Lord and His fingerprint in all I did.
What a blessing.
The final letter was filled with scripture and encouragement as a co-worker shared her prayer for my family and this new chapter. Then, the pages were blank.
Thank you, Lord for the opportunity to go where You lead me. I pray You will take the pen as you write the story of my life. It's all for You.
Here's to the turning of a new page.
Friday, October 11, 2013
Thursday, October 10, 2013
God is Good
First of all, let me say that again so you can really feel how powerful that statement is:
"God is good."
The months of August and September this year were full of roller coaster moments. After learning of the attempted suicide of one of the partipants in my program, my entire life was rocked. Not only was there the instant sickness that overwhelmed me; but, the first thing that came through my head was, "why?"
Why was I such a coward? When he opened up about his struggle with depression, addiction, feeling empty...why didn't I share my faith? Because of a job? Because it was against policy?
The upcoming days brought a lot of questions with it, and I soon found myself face down in prayer for God to guide me to clarity. Obstacles overwhelmed me as my husband supported me in the decisions I had to make. I would share my faith openly from that moment on, knowing that it would be a risk every day. My heart was burdened by the fact that as an employee of this company, I was disrespecting them by disobeying the rules they had put in place. Therefore, I followed what God had placed so heavily on my heart.
The final week of August I put in an application to pursue a position at my church. After putting off the call to the ministry many times before, I finally gave into what God had gently pushed me towards. The following day I received a phone call to set up a phone interview. With the busyness of my job on my schedule, God worked out every barrier that stood in the way and cleared the very day they wanted to talk with me.
From the moment I heard her voice on the phone, the excitement of hope was ignited. The details-although nothing I would have pursued before-were exactly what I needed at this season of my life. And, after a thoughtful conversation, I was asked to come in for an interview.
The first interview went well. I was able to share how God had spoken to me through the experiences over the past year. Before I had even walked back into work, I had received an email to go through to the next stage of the process. I was anxious to complete the assessment-totaling approximately two hours of my Friday afternoon. Then, I waited.
Monday I received word that they were interested in calling me in for a second interview. I was expectantly prayerful that this would be it, and I was flexible to come in on their time. That week of waiting seemed to drag on, but it allowed me the time I needed to process and pray over what was up ahead.
The afternoon of my interview, I walked in with confidence and left with confusion. Something about the dynamic in the room left me questioning things and my heart was crushed.
"If only I had a chance to explain myself. If I had more time to process some of the questions they had approached me with. If only I could tie up some loose ends."
I left with a bad feeling that day as the enemy tried to attack. However, the next morning I shared my concerns with my husband and received the phone call to come back in and chat.
Susan was amazing. Her words of wisdom eased any questions I had, and I was able to finally feel at ease in the process. I let my guard down and allowed the Lord to speak through me. Then, we left with a hug.
God gave me a peace that will surpass any understanding.
It was in that moment that I knew that He had shaped me for this pivotal moment in our lives.
Monday morning, September 30th, I walked into my supervision with my letter of resignation. I was able to share the testimony of trusting in the Lord and how He had prepared my family for this decision. Let me say this, when we walk by sight-we will be afraid.
Let's look at the facts:
I am married and recently started going through fertility treatments (more of that to come) alongside a $30,000 adoption. We have been hit with the cost of medical bills due to hospitalizations and multiple surgeries in the last three years. My car broke down in December and I have a car payment to afford. We are adults with bills and responsibilities to tend to, not to mention a mortgage. We are a two income family that, at this time, requires both incomes to pay our bills.
BUT, when we walk in faith alone-here is what God can do:
The day after I put in my two weeks as a total step of obedience, my husband was offered a job. (He has searched above and below for more than five years to find a supplement to his current income doing something he cares about.) The offer will cover more than what his current paycheck is taking on. Two days after that, I went in for my final interview and was offered the position that Friday making penny-for-penny what I am making right now. In a total of one week, God covered every single bill on our plate. I received a check from my teaching position (after waiting a month to get paid) that will pay towards more than half of my medical bills.We will be able to continue to financially support our Christian radio station. Not to mention, we will be getting an allowance that will cover our cell phones and internet services, knocking two bills off of our list to bless others.
All glory goes to Him alone. We are humbled by how much He has allowed us to be blessed with, and know that the season of pain was in fact in preparation for the outpouring of love we have received. Thank you, Lord.
God is good!
"God is good."
The months of August and September this year were full of roller coaster moments. After learning of the attempted suicide of one of the partipants in my program, my entire life was rocked. Not only was there the instant sickness that overwhelmed me; but, the first thing that came through my head was, "why?"
Why was I such a coward? When he opened up about his struggle with depression, addiction, feeling empty...why didn't I share my faith? Because of a job? Because it was against policy?
The upcoming days brought a lot of questions with it, and I soon found myself face down in prayer for God to guide me to clarity. Obstacles overwhelmed me as my husband supported me in the decisions I had to make. I would share my faith openly from that moment on, knowing that it would be a risk every day. My heart was burdened by the fact that as an employee of this company, I was disrespecting them by disobeying the rules they had put in place. Therefore, I followed what God had placed so heavily on my heart.
The final week of August I put in an application to pursue a position at my church. After putting off the call to the ministry many times before, I finally gave into what God had gently pushed me towards. The following day I received a phone call to set up a phone interview. With the busyness of my job on my schedule, God worked out every barrier that stood in the way and cleared the very day they wanted to talk with me.
From the moment I heard her voice on the phone, the excitement of hope was ignited. The details-although nothing I would have pursued before-were exactly what I needed at this season of my life. And, after a thoughtful conversation, I was asked to come in for an interview.
The first interview went well. I was able to share how God had spoken to me through the experiences over the past year. Before I had even walked back into work, I had received an email to go through to the next stage of the process. I was anxious to complete the assessment-totaling approximately two hours of my Friday afternoon. Then, I waited.
Monday I received word that they were interested in calling me in for a second interview. I was expectantly prayerful that this would be it, and I was flexible to come in on their time. That week of waiting seemed to drag on, but it allowed me the time I needed to process and pray over what was up ahead.
The afternoon of my interview, I walked in with confidence and left with confusion. Something about the dynamic in the room left me questioning things and my heart was crushed.
"If only I had a chance to explain myself. If I had more time to process some of the questions they had approached me with. If only I could tie up some loose ends."
I left with a bad feeling that day as the enemy tried to attack. However, the next morning I shared my concerns with my husband and received the phone call to come back in and chat.
Susan was amazing. Her words of wisdom eased any questions I had, and I was able to finally feel at ease in the process. I let my guard down and allowed the Lord to speak through me. Then, we left with a hug.
God gave me a peace that will surpass any understanding.
It was in that moment that I knew that He had shaped me for this pivotal moment in our lives.
Monday morning, September 30th, I walked into my supervision with my letter of resignation. I was able to share the testimony of trusting in the Lord and how He had prepared my family for this decision. Let me say this, when we walk by sight-we will be afraid.
Let's look at the facts:
I am married and recently started going through fertility treatments (more of that to come) alongside a $30,000 adoption. We have been hit with the cost of medical bills due to hospitalizations and multiple surgeries in the last three years. My car broke down in December and I have a car payment to afford. We are adults with bills and responsibilities to tend to, not to mention a mortgage. We are a two income family that, at this time, requires both incomes to pay our bills.
BUT, when we walk in faith alone-here is what God can do:
The day after I put in my two weeks as a total step of obedience, my husband was offered a job. (He has searched above and below for more than five years to find a supplement to his current income doing something he cares about.) The offer will cover more than what his current paycheck is taking on. Two days after that, I went in for my final interview and was offered the position that Friday making penny-for-penny what I am making right now. In a total of one week, God covered every single bill on our plate. I received a check from my teaching position (after waiting a month to get paid) that will pay towards more than half of my medical bills.We will be able to continue to financially support our Christian radio station. Not to mention, we will be getting an allowance that will cover our cell phones and internet services, knocking two bills off of our list to bless others.
All glory goes to Him alone. We are humbled by how much He has allowed us to be blessed with, and know that the season of pain was in fact in preparation for the outpouring of love we have received. Thank you, Lord.
God is good!