Friday, October 11, 2013 marked my last day in the role of Family Support Coordinator at Family Expectations. It was such a bittersweet day as I was sad to have to leave so many of the friends I had come to love. It started like any other Friday.
Come in.
Sit down.
Annette plays the "Good morning song".
Rap to Toby Mac and have a good belly laugh.
Rush to get data entry completed before our team meeting.
Go downstairs and enjoy breakfast with the group.
Take part in fellowship before heading into the training room.
Then, it quickly changed into a room full of emotions.
My director stood in front of the group as he made weekly announcements and called me up to the front. My true blue personality type took over as my stomach filled with nerves and my eyes filled with tears. He shared that is was my last day in the role and the experiences we had over the past year and a half. He mentioned that there were concerns when I took the role whether this was the right position for me to be in. We discussed the fears that come from working in this type of environment day-in and day-out--how he was afraid I would lose the sweet spirit I had come with. Then, he looked at me and stated that I never lost it. He shared his pride in the work I had put in for Family Expectations and the love I had shown. Then, he turned over the floor as I shared my heart.
I cannot express the ease in which my words came out. I shared my heart with my co-workers and how God was leading me into the ministry. I discussed my excitement in the turning of a new page and the joy that had come from working with each and every one of them. Then, I took a seat.
But, the expression of love didn't stop there. My supervisor stood in front of everyone and presented me with one of the most thoughtful gifts I could have ever imagined. She placed in my hands a journal. Scribed on the front were the words, "For I walk by faith, not by sight". She shared that my teammates had written memories and words of encouragement as I start this new journey.
I choked back the tears and let my team know of my gratitude. I listened to what would be my final FE team meeting before heading back to my desk. There, I was greeted with homemade cookies (one of my weaknesses). People gathered around as they enjoyed their kind words and hugs.
I wrapped up the morning and packed my belongings before heading out to my grandparents. It is in moments like these that we are reminded of the impact we have on others and the purpose we serve. As I sat in Gramma and Pawpaw's living room, I carefully flipped through the beautiful journal. Within it were page after page of memories to cherish. I was amazed by some of the letters that followed-letters of how I had shown the light of the Lord and His fingerprint in all I did.
What a blessing.
The final letter was filled with scripture and encouragement as a co-worker shared her prayer for my family and this new chapter. Then, the pages were blank.
Thank you, Lord for the opportunity to go where You lead me. I pray You will take the pen as you write the story of my life. It's all for You.
Here's to the turning of a new page.
Friday, October 11, 2013
Thursday, October 10, 2013
God is Good
First of all, let me say that again so you can really feel how powerful that statement is:
"God is good."
The months of August and September this year were full of roller coaster moments. After learning of the attempted suicide of one of the partipants in my program, my entire life was rocked. Not only was there the instant sickness that overwhelmed me; but, the first thing that came through my head was, "why?"
Why was I such a coward? When he opened up about his struggle with depression, addiction, feeling empty...why didn't I share my faith? Because of a job? Because it was against policy?
The upcoming days brought a lot of questions with it, and I soon found myself face down in prayer for God to guide me to clarity. Obstacles overwhelmed me as my husband supported me in the decisions I had to make. I would share my faith openly from that moment on, knowing that it would be a risk every day. My heart was burdened by the fact that as an employee of this company, I was disrespecting them by disobeying the rules they had put in place. Therefore, I followed what God had placed so heavily on my heart.
The final week of August I put in an application to pursue a position at my church. After putting off the call to the ministry many times before, I finally gave into what God had gently pushed me towards. The following day I received a phone call to set up a phone interview. With the busyness of my job on my schedule, God worked out every barrier that stood in the way and cleared the very day they wanted to talk with me.
From the moment I heard her voice on the phone, the excitement of hope was ignited. The details-although nothing I would have pursued before-were exactly what I needed at this season of my life. And, after a thoughtful conversation, I was asked to come in for an interview.
The first interview went well. I was able to share how God had spoken to me through the experiences over the past year. Before I had even walked back into work, I had received an email to go through to the next stage of the process. I was anxious to complete the assessment-totaling approximately two hours of my Friday afternoon. Then, I waited.
Monday I received word that they were interested in calling me in for a second interview. I was expectantly prayerful that this would be it, and I was flexible to come in on their time. That week of waiting seemed to drag on, but it allowed me the time I needed to process and pray over what was up ahead.
The afternoon of my interview, I walked in with confidence and left with confusion. Something about the dynamic in the room left me questioning things and my heart was crushed.
"If only I had a chance to explain myself. If I had more time to process some of the questions they had approached me with. If only I could tie up some loose ends."
I left with a bad feeling that day as the enemy tried to attack. However, the next morning I shared my concerns with my husband and received the phone call to come back in and chat.
Susan was amazing. Her words of wisdom eased any questions I had, and I was able to finally feel at ease in the process. I let my guard down and allowed the Lord to speak through me. Then, we left with a hug.
God gave me a peace that will surpass any understanding.
It was in that moment that I knew that He had shaped me for this pivotal moment in our lives.
Monday morning, September 30th, I walked into my supervision with my letter of resignation. I was able to share the testimony of trusting in the Lord and how He had prepared my family for this decision. Let me say this, when we walk by sight-we will be afraid.
Let's look at the facts:
I am married and recently started going through fertility treatments (more of that to come) alongside a $30,000 adoption. We have been hit with the cost of medical bills due to hospitalizations and multiple surgeries in the last three years. My car broke down in December and I have a car payment to afford. We are adults with bills and responsibilities to tend to, not to mention a mortgage. We are a two income family that, at this time, requires both incomes to pay our bills.
BUT, when we walk in faith alone-here is what God can do:
The day after I put in my two weeks as a total step of obedience, my husband was offered a job. (He has searched above and below for more than five years to find a supplement to his current income doing something he cares about.) The offer will cover more than what his current paycheck is taking on. Two days after that, I went in for my final interview and was offered the position that Friday making penny-for-penny what I am making right now. In a total of one week, God covered every single bill on our plate. I received a check from my teaching position (after waiting a month to get paid) that will pay towards more than half of my medical bills.We will be able to continue to financially support our Christian radio station. Not to mention, we will be getting an allowance that will cover our cell phones and internet services, knocking two bills off of our list to bless others.
All glory goes to Him alone. We are humbled by how much He has allowed us to be blessed with, and know that the season of pain was in fact in preparation for the outpouring of love we have received. Thank you, Lord.
God is good!
"God is good."
The months of August and September this year were full of roller coaster moments. After learning of the attempted suicide of one of the partipants in my program, my entire life was rocked. Not only was there the instant sickness that overwhelmed me; but, the first thing that came through my head was, "why?"
Why was I such a coward? When he opened up about his struggle with depression, addiction, feeling empty...why didn't I share my faith? Because of a job? Because it was against policy?
The upcoming days brought a lot of questions with it, and I soon found myself face down in prayer for God to guide me to clarity. Obstacles overwhelmed me as my husband supported me in the decisions I had to make. I would share my faith openly from that moment on, knowing that it would be a risk every day. My heart was burdened by the fact that as an employee of this company, I was disrespecting them by disobeying the rules they had put in place. Therefore, I followed what God had placed so heavily on my heart.
The final week of August I put in an application to pursue a position at my church. After putting off the call to the ministry many times before, I finally gave into what God had gently pushed me towards. The following day I received a phone call to set up a phone interview. With the busyness of my job on my schedule, God worked out every barrier that stood in the way and cleared the very day they wanted to talk with me.
From the moment I heard her voice on the phone, the excitement of hope was ignited. The details-although nothing I would have pursued before-were exactly what I needed at this season of my life. And, after a thoughtful conversation, I was asked to come in for an interview.
The first interview went well. I was able to share how God had spoken to me through the experiences over the past year. Before I had even walked back into work, I had received an email to go through to the next stage of the process. I was anxious to complete the assessment-totaling approximately two hours of my Friday afternoon. Then, I waited.
Monday I received word that they were interested in calling me in for a second interview. I was expectantly prayerful that this would be it, and I was flexible to come in on their time. That week of waiting seemed to drag on, but it allowed me the time I needed to process and pray over what was up ahead.
The afternoon of my interview, I walked in with confidence and left with confusion. Something about the dynamic in the room left me questioning things and my heart was crushed.
"If only I had a chance to explain myself. If I had more time to process some of the questions they had approached me with. If only I could tie up some loose ends."
I left with a bad feeling that day as the enemy tried to attack. However, the next morning I shared my concerns with my husband and received the phone call to come back in and chat.
Susan was amazing. Her words of wisdom eased any questions I had, and I was able to finally feel at ease in the process. I let my guard down and allowed the Lord to speak through me. Then, we left with a hug.
God gave me a peace that will surpass any understanding.
It was in that moment that I knew that He had shaped me for this pivotal moment in our lives.
Monday morning, September 30th, I walked into my supervision with my letter of resignation. I was able to share the testimony of trusting in the Lord and how He had prepared my family for this decision. Let me say this, when we walk by sight-we will be afraid.
Let's look at the facts:
I am married and recently started going through fertility treatments (more of that to come) alongside a $30,000 adoption. We have been hit with the cost of medical bills due to hospitalizations and multiple surgeries in the last three years. My car broke down in December and I have a car payment to afford. We are adults with bills and responsibilities to tend to, not to mention a mortgage. We are a two income family that, at this time, requires both incomes to pay our bills.
BUT, when we walk in faith alone-here is what God can do:
The day after I put in my two weeks as a total step of obedience, my husband was offered a job. (He has searched above and below for more than five years to find a supplement to his current income doing something he cares about.) The offer will cover more than what his current paycheck is taking on. Two days after that, I went in for my final interview and was offered the position that Friday making penny-for-penny what I am making right now. In a total of one week, God covered every single bill on our plate. I received a check from my teaching position (after waiting a month to get paid) that will pay towards more than half of my medical bills.We will be able to continue to financially support our Christian radio station. Not to mention, we will be getting an allowance that will cover our cell phones and internet services, knocking two bills off of our list to bless others.
All glory goes to Him alone. We are humbled by how much He has allowed us to be blessed with, and know that the season of pain was in fact in preparation for the outpouring of love we have received. Thank you, Lord.
God is good!
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
Open Sesame
I have prayed (and prayed) for doors to be open wide so that I can run through them...full speed-no turning back. It seems this door ahead of me was recently unlocked. I pray that tomorrow will lead me to stand before that door as the handle is turned and He says, "come on in."
Here is to stepping out of my security and into the direction that God wants for my life.
Here is to stepping out of my security and into the direction that God wants for my life.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Helpless
Helpless.
There is nothing quite like the feeling associated with that one word; and, last week I felt totally and completely helpless.
Monday morning started as any other day at work. It was rush, rush, rush...work, work, work. My head ached from talking to the brick wall I faced in office visits. That is until about 3pm as I received the painful phone call that one of the dads in my program tried to take his life.
Aside from choking back the sickness that overcame me, all I could do was listen in disbelief as I offered a supportive ear. I wrapped up the phone call as I held back the tears that wanted to flood my eyes. The details made me hurt and all I could do was move in robotic mode to try to get my last few visits taken care of. I left in a hurry as I ran down the stairs and through the parking lot. I held it in until I got to my car, and then the emotion found me.
Helpless.
How could someone get to that point? To the point where their own life seemed completely worthless that they feel the better option is to not have one? Why? Why was I such a coward in my last conversation with him that I couldn't just speak up and say the very thing that could have saved him? Why didn't I say, "No, you can't do this alone. You really need God as your Lord and Savior to restore your marriage"?
Excuses.
I can tell you why...it was because I received the threat when I first took this position that despite my best intentions, any voice of God could jeopardize all of our efforts as a program and could cause others to lose their job. What is more important though, a job or someone's eternity?
Helpless.
I drove home that night with the thoughts racing that I should have been better at my real job-leading others to Christ. The next day brought more stress with it. After a rough day of putting on a happy face and pretending to be okay, I was faced with a conversation that ended with the outcome being out of my hands.
Helpless.
My husband was more than supportive as he shared that he would stand beside me no matter what I chose to do. He discussed getting a second job to pick up my slack, but I knew better than to place that burden on him. I was jumping the gun. The worst case scenario hadn't happened yet. I decided to wait.
Helpless.
The next day I went through the motions until just after lunch time. After receiving word that my greatest fear came true, I lost it. I lost all control over hiding. I lost myself and gave it over to God.
I prayed for God to take the pain and confusion away and provide answers. I prayed for His direction to be made evident in my life. I prayed for healing for the hurt families around me. I prayed for wisdom and bravery to do what is right by God's standards-not the world's. I prayed to be used and moved so that the limits of sharing His glory would have no boundaries. I prayed for rest.
That day I received a phone call that could lead to bigger, better things for the kingdom of God. My boss gave me two days off for personal time to restore my spirit. Those two things worked together in a way only God could have provided.
Thank you, Lord for open doors.
Therefore, I'm standing here with arms wide open waiting for God's timing to mold me into what He wants for my life. I pray that you will stand in agreement with me and my family as we go into this journey ahead-not aware of what lies before us. Pray for being quick to respond and eager to obey-no turning back. Pray for thanksgiving in our weakest moments. That we may be grateful for the times we are helpless because God provides hope.
There is nothing quite like the feeling associated with that one word; and, last week I felt totally and completely helpless.
Monday morning started as any other day at work. It was rush, rush, rush...work, work, work. My head ached from talking to the brick wall I faced in office visits. That is until about 3pm as I received the painful phone call that one of the dads in my program tried to take his life.
Aside from choking back the sickness that overcame me, all I could do was listen in disbelief as I offered a supportive ear. I wrapped up the phone call as I held back the tears that wanted to flood my eyes. The details made me hurt and all I could do was move in robotic mode to try to get my last few visits taken care of. I left in a hurry as I ran down the stairs and through the parking lot. I held it in until I got to my car, and then the emotion found me.
Helpless.
How could someone get to that point? To the point where their own life seemed completely worthless that they feel the better option is to not have one? Why? Why was I such a coward in my last conversation with him that I couldn't just speak up and say the very thing that could have saved him? Why didn't I say, "No, you can't do this alone. You really need God as your Lord and Savior to restore your marriage"?
Excuses.
I can tell you why...it was because I received the threat when I first took this position that despite my best intentions, any voice of God could jeopardize all of our efforts as a program and could cause others to lose their job. What is more important though, a job or someone's eternity?
Helpless.
I drove home that night with the thoughts racing that I should have been better at my real job-leading others to Christ. The next day brought more stress with it. After a rough day of putting on a happy face and pretending to be okay, I was faced with a conversation that ended with the outcome being out of my hands.
Helpless.
My husband was more than supportive as he shared that he would stand beside me no matter what I chose to do. He discussed getting a second job to pick up my slack, but I knew better than to place that burden on him. I was jumping the gun. The worst case scenario hadn't happened yet. I decided to wait.
Helpless.
The next day I went through the motions until just after lunch time. After receiving word that my greatest fear came true, I lost it. I lost all control over hiding. I lost myself and gave it over to God.
I prayed for God to take the pain and confusion away and provide answers. I prayed for His direction to be made evident in my life. I prayed for healing for the hurt families around me. I prayed for wisdom and bravery to do what is right by God's standards-not the world's. I prayed to be used and moved so that the limits of sharing His glory would have no boundaries. I prayed for rest.
That day I received a phone call that could lead to bigger, better things for the kingdom of God. My boss gave me two days off for personal time to restore my spirit. Those two things worked together in a way only God could have provided.
Thank you, Lord for open doors.
Therefore, I'm standing here with arms wide open waiting for God's timing to mold me into what He wants for my life. I pray that you will stand in agreement with me and my family as we go into this journey ahead-not aware of what lies before us. Pray for being quick to respond and eager to obey-no turning back. Pray for thanksgiving in our weakest moments. That we may be grateful for the times we are helpless because God provides hope.
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Just like flossing...
I can remember it like it was yesterday when we sat as a couple on the left side of the auditorium the first Sunday of this year. Pastor Craig questioned seriously what words would be read if we were to write our story.
He used the example of when he gets up and flosses, he is more likely to continue making positive decisions. It reminded me of the breakfast bar commercials where one person chooses to eat the healthy snack instead of the donut that will lead to the slice of pizza, etc.
You just have to start flossing.
It was then and there that we made the decision to start something. It started out with making the conscious effort to attend church-every single week. Yes, we both grew up in the same hometown church-attending regularly. I was there on Sunday mornings and evenings, and went to Focus (our youth ministry) on Wednesdays. I sang in children's choir, was in every Christmas play, attended VBS as a kiddo, accepted Christ as my savior, was baptized and looked forward to going to each and every camp that came on the calendar.
After our longtime youth pastor left, I no longer had a personal relationship with the leaders of our ministry. I wasn't included in the "inner circle" of Christians at church. You know, the pretty girls and cute boys that got along with the pastor and his wife..the families that were highly involved by donating their time and resources to the other teens (with their large houses and swimming pools). I wasn't a cool kid. In fact, I was a scrawny, under confident little girl with glasses and braces that struggled to fit in.
Then, my priorities shifted. I attended churches weekly with whichever boyfriend I was dating at the time, and rumors spread. No one missed me when I wasn't there.I wasn't a "good leader" anymore. The people I once called friends began pushing me away (or maybe I was pulling away). I left my hometown church in high school, searching for a place to call my "home".
Once in college, I faced one of the most difficult times of my life. Each day became harder and harder to want to go on. I attended the BCM on campus and even tried to go to a few small groups in town. Everywhere I went I felt judged. I didn't have the singing voice to lead praise and worship, I didn't have the money to attend extra functions where everyone went for fellowship, I didn't have the same priorities of having fun as most of the other people around me. I felt that each of them were hypocrites for claiming to love the God of the Universe and acting the complete opposite towards those around them. They would mock the less fortunate and drink on the weekends before going to church. They gave Christians a bad name, but then again...so did I.
It was hard to see past myself when I was amidst the biggest pity party of my life. I was overly critical and made excuses for everything. Even for the first few years of our relationship, my husband and I would talk about our relationships with God and would chose not to go to church for whatever reason we could find at the time.
"We don't get anything out of it when we go."
"We don't believe in the leadership there."
Aside from occassional visits or going on holidays, we went years without attending.
So, as we sat towards the middle aisle in January, we chose to start flossing. We chose to start calling Lifechurch our church home.
In the following months, we made the decision to give our tithes and offerings. We chose to serve. We attended the "newcomer" event at our church-after attending off-and-on for four years. We chose to change our attitudes. We chose to make our number one priority our relationship with Christ Jesus, our Lord. We chose to put our family directly below Him. We chose to pray together.
Every day seems to be a fork in the road where we are forced to decide which path to take. We are continuing to let go as we entrust Him with the finances that rightfully are His. More recently, we have been faced with the decision to give our careers over to the Lord. Today seems to be the last heartbreak before giving our jobs over to Him. I prayed at the beginning of the week for God to provide whatever his will was for our family. As my husband was approached for a potential job, I prayed that whatever was right would happen. If at any point, it was a distraction for what He had planned for our family-if it was a temptation that we needed to resist-I prayed for God to slam the door.
I received word this morning that the door was closed, locked, and boarded up.
Therefore, I am personally (and audibly) giving my family over to the Lord. I pray that He will use us as an instrument for His will and he will provide the ability to follow the desires of our hearts that He purposefully placed within us. I am standing with arms open to receive whatever He wants for our family. I pray that others will stand in agreement with us in the decisions we make and we will be granted clarity during this difficult time. Thank you for the love and support you have given us thus far, and may God bless you as He has blessed us.
He used the example of when he gets up and flosses, he is more likely to continue making positive decisions. It reminded me of the breakfast bar commercials where one person chooses to eat the healthy snack instead of the donut that will lead to the slice of pizza, etc.
You just have to start flossing.
It was then and there that we made the decision to start something. It started out with making the conscious effort to attend church-every single week. Yes, we both grew up in the same hometown church-attending regularly. I was there on Sunday mornings and evenings, and went to Focus (our youth ministry) on Wednesdays. I sang in children's choir, was in every Christmas play, attended VBS as a kiddo, accepted Christ as my savior, was baptized and looked forward to going to each and every camp that came on the calendar.
After our longtime youth pastor left, I no longer had a personal relationship with the leaders of our ministry. I wasn't included in the "inner circle" of Christians at church. You know, the pretty girls and cute boys that got along with the pastor and his wife..the families that were highly involved by donating their time and resources to the other teens (with their large houses and swimming pools). I wasn't a cool kid. In fact, I was a scrawny, under confident little girl with glasses and braces that struggled to fit in.
Then, my priorities shifted. I attended churches weekly with whichever boyfriend I was dating at the time, and rumors spread. No one missed me when I wasn't there.I wasn't a "good leader" anymore. The people I once called friends began pushing me away (or maybe I was pulling away). I left my hometown church in high school, searching for a place to call my "home".
Once in college, I faced one of the most difficult times of my life. Each day became harder and harder to want to go on. I attended the BCM on campus and even tried to go to a few small groups in town. Everywhere I went I felt judged. I didn't have the singing voice to lead praise and worship, I didn't have the money to attend extra functions where everyone went for fellowship, I didn't have the same priorities of having fun as most of the other people around me. I felt that each of them were hypocrites for claiming to love the God of the Universe and acting the complete opposite towards those around them. They would mock the less fortunate and drink on the weekends before going to church. They gave Christians a bad name, but then again...so did I.
It was hard to see past myself when I was amidst the biggest pity party of my life. I was overly critical and made excuses for everything. Even for the first few years of our relationship, my husband and I would talk about our relationships with God and would chose not to go to church for whatever reason we could find at the time.
"We don't get anything out of it when we go."
"We don't believe in the leadership there."
Aside from occassional visits or going on holidays, we went years without attending.
So, as we sat towards the middle aisle in January, we chose to start flossing. We chose to start calling Lifechurch our church home.
In the following months, we made the decision to give our tithes and offerings. We chose to serve. We attended the "newcomer" event at our church-after attending off-and-on for four years. We chose to change our attitudes. We chose to make our number one priority our relationship with Christ Jesus, our Lord. We chose to put our family directly below Him. We chose to pray together.
Every day seems to be a fork in the road where we are forced to decide which path to take. We are continuing to let go as we entrust Him with the finances that rightfully are His. More recently, we have been faced with the decision to give our careers over to the Lord. Today seems to be the last heartbreak before giving our jobs over to Him. I prayed at the beginning of the week for God to provide whatever his will was for our family. As my husband was approached for a potential job, I prayed that whatever was right would happen. If at any point, it was a distraction for what He had planned for our family-if it was a temptation that we needed to resist-I prayed for God to slam the door.
I received word this morning that the door was closed, locked, and boarded up.
Therefore, I am personally (and audibly) giving my family over to the Lord. I pray that He will use us as an instrument for His will and he will provide the ability to follow the desires of our hearts that He purposefully placed within us. I am standing with arms open to receive whatever He wants for our family. I pray that others will stand in agreement with us in the decisions we make and we will be granted clarity during this difficult time. Thank you for the love and support you have given us thus far, and may God bless you as He has blessed us.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
In my world...
In my world
In my mind
I picture things different
All the time
My mornings begin with giggles and squeals
From tiny little voices
In which God is revealed
I don't rush to get ready
To drive away from home
Or sit in front of a screen
Or answer a phone
Instead I answer the continual "Why"
From curious learners
Hungry to know what's under God's sky
I make breakfast and get ready
To see what is in store
As each day is a new beginning
For us to explore
A kiss goodbye to the one I love
As he steps out the door
To do something worth working for
My lessons learned
Become things to teach
So that my family may know
Everything is within reach
I am needed, it's true
To rock and soothe and feed
A baby that depends strictly
On me to meet their needs
But it isn't just a title
The desire to be "mom"
There is something much more
To my dreams that I long
The greatest blessing so far in my life
Was when God graced me with the love
And a man took me as his wife
It wasn't just a ring, a diamond or a day
That defined my marriage
But it became me
In every way
Every decision from that moment on
Didn't belong to just me
It was for us, for a purpose
For God's greater need
To glorify Him was the desire of my heart
So that others may know
They are never apart
Joined as one
We became bigger than us
When we said I do
And committed to trust
So the life that I want isn't just about me
It is a life that I long for
So others may see
A family that is loving
Centered around Him
So that when they see our lives
They can't help but question
"Why are they so happy?"
"What's different about them?"
"I want what they have"
They will be changed from within
The pitter patter of little feet
Is only a moment
In God's grand scheme
Days fly by
People grow old
But the life that we live
Is His story to be told
May our lives be a witness
A way we can show
That the only thing that remains always
Is the salvation given from Him alone
In my mind
I picture things different
All the time
My mornings begin with giggles and squeals
From tiny little voices
In which God is revealed
I don't rush to get ready
To drive away from home
Or sit in front of a screen
Or answer a phone
Instead I answer the continual "Why"
From curious learners
Hungry to know what's under God's sky
I make breakfast and get ready
To see what is in store
As each day is a new beginning
For us to explore
A kiss goodbye to the one I love
As he steps out the door
To do something worth working for
My lessons learned
Become things to teach
So that my family may know
Everything is within reach
I am needed, it's true
To rock and soothe and feed
A baby that depends strictly
On me to meet their needs
But it isn't just a title
The desire to be "mom"
There is something much more
To my dreams that I long
The greatest blessing so far in my life
Was when God graced me with the love
And a man took me as his wife
It wasn't just a ring, a diamond or a day
That defined my marriage
But it became me
In every way
Every decision from that moment on
Didn't belong to just me
It was for us, for a purpose
For God's greater need
To glorify Him was the desire of my heart
So that others may know
They are never apart
Joined as one
We became bigger than us
When we said I do
And committed to trust
So the life that I want isn't just about me
It is a life that I long for
So others may see
A family that is loving
Centered around Him
So that when they see our lives
They can't help but question
"Why are they so happy?"
"What's different about them?"
"I want what they have"
They will be changed from within
The pitter patter of little feet
Is only a moment
In God's grand scheme
Days fly by
People grow old
But the life that we live
Is His story to be told
May our lives be a witness
A way we can show
That the only thing that remains always
Is the salvation given from Him alone
Spell Check
I often find it entertaining to go back and read what I actually put down in writing in the spur of the moment. Let it be known right now that I do not proofread as I should. When I finally have the time to put my thoughts to the page, it is mostly during the middle of a busy work day when I have approximately an hour to prepare some form of leftovers from the fridge, answer the phone (or I'll be returning the calls later), catch up on data entry and paperwork from my clients, sit down and try to relax a few moments, check emails, and type something while chewing my halfway warmed food. Therefore, I am openly admitting (and apologizing) for the lack of proper grammar and/or misspelled words that you are reading over at any given moment. I promise I will (at least try) to spell check the next time I hit publish for your reading sanity.
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